（今天想牛有高盛报告，有较高学习价值）20181025【充实计划】第870期

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充实每一天 发表于 2018-10-25 06:37
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|新充实挑战|   |公告【想成为牛人】|
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昨日阅读2小时，累计阅读896小时。

充实每一天 发表于 2018-10-25 06:37
【加入充实计划】【了解充实计划】
|新充实挑战|   |公告【想成为牛人】|
|【公告】照片图片额外奖励|

昨日阅读1小时，累计阅读432小时。

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2018-10-25

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Read book "Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It" by Chris Voss and Tahl Raz

We negotiate or persuade dozens of times a day. Then there’s the big stuff that changes the course of life: getting a raise; landing a job offer; buying a car or house. Most of us had no formal training in negotiation, or were taught incorrectly. This book is your secret weapon for mad success.
MAIN CONCEPT: Tactical empathy: “This is listening as a martial art, balancing the subtle behaviors of emotional intelligence and the assertive skills of influence, to gain access to the mind of another person.”
IS IT FUN TO READ: Finished it in a day. The book’s full of riveting life-and-death hostage negotiations, and Voss spins a damn good yarn.
There is so much crazy useful stuff in this book that it would be a bargain at 100x the price. For example, Voss advocates getting to “No” before getting to “Yes.” To those schooled in academic negotiation, this may seem heretical. But it makes all kinds of sense: letting your adversary say a solid “no” gives them a feeling of safety, security and control -- a great starting point to a negotiation. The technique of asking calibrated open-ended questions is pure gold (e.g. “How do I do that?” or “What’s important to you about that?”).

Then there’s the step-by-step protocol for negotiating your salary and the 6-step Ackerman bargaining model. There’s mirroring: you repeat people’s words verbatim, so they feel understood. There’s labeling, where you identify the emotion behind what people are saying, thereby deepening empathy. Great quote: “Good negotiators, going in, know they have to be ready for possible surprises; great negotiators aim to use their skills to reveal the surprises they are certain exist.”

The techniques were honed by real-life negotiations with actual bad guys. If the techniques work in those critical situations, surely they’re good enough to help you negotiate a raise. In the end, this is a book about not just being good at negotiation, but being great at life. “Never Split the Difference” is serious wisdom, every bit of it earned, conveyed with great humor, storytelling and insight. Read it to be a more effective human.

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